adultmom

cisgender:

YEAH, THIS IS TIM HEIDECKER… YEAH… PASTOR HERICKSON’S MINEY NINEY TINE TOWN… PI… PASTOR ERICKSON’S MINEY MINEY TINY TIME TOWN. OKAY… MMHM. YEAH. YeEes… NO! M-E… M-I-N-E-Y!!! MMM-MM-MM-MMM. NO, INCORRECT. I’ll give you a cur— the more current address. Ready? Yes. I’m gonna give you the curr- the current - i’ll give you the current address NOW. IT IS SEVEN SEVEN SEVEN FOUR THREE SEVEN FIVE TWO FOUR CHESTER CHESTER AVENUE PAUL RIGGGAAAL BOULEVARD, AND THAT’S ON SATURDAY. FOUR! FOUR! FOUR! FOUR! ONE. Lovely, I can’t wait to hear this. Also, aka Brown Town. go— s, say this way. saturday aka BROWN TOWN. say that. say that out loud. saturday aka BROWN TOWN. saturday aka BROWN TOWN. what’s the boulevard? PAUL RIGGGAAAL… p-r… P-A-U-L R-I-G-G-G-A-A-A-L. paul RIGGGAAAL boulevard. saturday aka BROWN TOWN.

bbggh, SPAGHETT. Oops, I mean CIGARETTE JUICE. 

pigeonsatan:

orbitars:

how to summon pigeon satan:

• draw pentagram
• sprinkle bread crumbs over pentagram

ＦＯＯＬＩＳＨ ＭＯＲＴＡＬ ＤＯ ＹＯＵ ＲＥＡＬＬＹ ＴＨＩＮＫ… ＩＳ ＴＨＡＴ ＢＲＥＡＤ

cisgender:

bein a girl rules

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iM GONNA MURDER MYSELF IF YOU DON’T FUCKING COME TO MY NEW MALL 

the crow has his own fucking personal space while the guy absentmindedly flips through a magazine 

oh my fucking god my neighbor adopted a baby crow and he’s sitting outside on his front porch in a chair and the bird is on the back of another chair oh my FUCKING GOD my neighbor is flipping through a magazine and the bird is on the back of his own chair cleaning his feathers